Looking Back

This coming Sunday, August 29th, it will be exactly 2 years since Brandon and I found out that little Christian was on his way! That was one of the best days of my life, and I'm sure that I will never forget anything about that day. Brandon and I had been trying to get pregnant for over a year and a half at that point, and I had honestly given up all hope of becoming a mother. So I set up an appointment with a new doctor to talk about fertility testing, and apparently there was no need. She did a pregnancy test at the office and came in to tell us that it was POSITIVE! Brandon and I looked at each other in shock, and asked the doctor if there was some mix up with the samples because mine were always negative. She assured us that it was all correct, then it really sank in. I was finally pregnant!! I cried tears of joy for the rest of the day! All our dreams were coming true, and we were finally able to start the family that we had been praying for.

Well what a lot of you might not know is what a rough road it was for me when we were trying to get pregnant. Every month was a disappointment, and plenty of tears that came along with it. Getting my hopes up, thinking this month I was pregnant for sure, only to be let down again. It takes a toll on any woman who is ready to be a mother, and thank God for my awesome husband, great family and friends. I couldn't have gotten through that time of my life without them. One night my girls and I were hanging out at my house talking, and for some reason we started doodling on this pad of paper that was sitting on the table. We called them our goal sheets, dated them, and we each hung them on the mirror in our bathrooms. The date was August 29, 2007. Obviously, my goal sheet was all about getting pregnant and here is what it looked like:

It was exactly one year after making this, to the day, that we found out that we were finally pregnant! How crazy is that?! I don't believe in coincidences. I believe that God is in control of everything we go through in our lives; good or bad, for us to learn and grow from every experience. I see now looking back, that all the time I waited and wished for a baby God was teaching me patience. This is something that I lacked when it came to anything I wanted; I wanted it right then. One thing about getting pregnant, you can try all you want, but the creator of life will have the final decision on when it's the right time. This was very hard to deal with as I was going through it, but Brandon and I needed that time to wait. Not only to grow closer to each other, but to grow closer to God. Christian was born on April 16, 2009 and I have been able to stay home with him from day one. If we would have gotten pregnant when I wanted, I would be a working mom. There is nothing wrong with being a working mother, but for me staying home with my kids has been something I always dreamed of. I thank God everyday for the blessing that is my beautiful son, Christian. He is happy, healthy, extremely smart and full of love. Being a mother is more than I could have ever dreamed of. Thank you Jesus!

I just wanted to take this time to tell any couples out there that might be struggling to get pregnant, that God is for you and he wants to give you all the blessings that your heart desires...but in His time. Keep the faith and know that you are a child of the most high God, and He already knows what your future holds. Your time will come when you least expect it.

Many Blessings,
Vanessa